I have no idea if I am yet in the state of producing any kind of intellectual text that is not completely overrun by emotion and comparable to drunken Facebook messages that should never have been posted, but I just have to do something. I have to try to get at least a few sentences out, because that contributes to me eventually feeling better.
I'll start by saying that WoW does not feel good at the moment. WoW is not my haven right now. Logging into the game is not the moment I forget about things, but the moment I get close to something I have remembered all along. It's like a drug addiction and I cannot decide whether to wean myself once and for all, or whether to reduce the dose slowly. And what that dose is exactly, I don't even know. Another question I keep asking myself is if I should let the sha infest me for as long as I become immune to it, or at least numb, or if I should try to push it away.
Truth is that WoW is not just a game. While I now wish I didn't always stick my heart in absolutely everything I do, that is exactly what makes WoW as it is. It's a game people play with their hearts. They've grown up with WoW and experienced life-changing events as a person who plays World of Warcraft. That's not to say I'm happy with how I feel, because it's bloody hurts. But that's life, and that's WoW. WoW is the only game I am willing to play even when it doesn't make me happy, and I don't even know why that is. Maybe it's special, maybe I'm just tied to it. Quitting WoW was never an option. Maybe it wouldn't make a difference if I did, maybe some people's WoW days would just shape back into what they were before they knew me. But I don't play World of Warcraft because it's a good game. I play it because it's my game, because it's permanently a part of me, whether I want it or not.
Good loa do I feel bad, though. There's no denying that. I absolutely hate feeling this way, but I also see melancholy as something beautiful. I'm emo like that, yes. Or just too much of a Finn. I can't help but wonder what things will be like from now on. Maybe now I can complete Loremaster of Outland and take some pleasure in it. Maybe now I won't feel like interfering someone else's domain. Or maybe I will find myself sitting on that bridge in Howling Fjord just staring at Skorn, because that view makes my soul rest. But what do you do when absolutely everything reminds you of something in particular? Do you just colour new content with new memories, or is it just a matter of getting used to it? Time gilds memories, does it not?
Showing posts with label memories. Show all posts
Showing posts with label memories. Show all posts
Tuesday, 12 February 2013
Wednesday, 5 December 2012
20 Days of WoW blogging #4
No no, I haven't abandoned this challenge. I started it in November, but a ton of other stuff happened and I ended up posting over 20 times over the passed month, so I placed this one aside temporarily. But now blog stuff has calmed down and I dive back into the depths of my hazy mind to ponder this WoW thing.
Check out Spellbound to learn more about the challenge!
Day 4 – Your best WoW memory
After giving it a thorough thought I came to the conclusion that it's not a concrete event or anything like that that I want to talk about here. It's an emotional experience that occurred over time. It's the feeling of having experienced something, conquered something, learnt something. For example, we lacked maps to most instances until Cataclysm. Back when we didn't have the maps, I had to learn to navigate through those places with my visual memory. It was a challenge, being quite new to the game otherwise, too, but once I finally figured out the places and found something - or someone -, it was a very rewarding experience.
I'm not saying that I miss the time before instance maps, or that they should be removed from the game. No. They make a very good addition and should have existed longer than they have. It's very similar to people who claim that vanilla was the best era of WoW. They don't really think so, but mix up game features with their own feelings. They don't miss the server crashes, class imbalance or incompetent specs. They just really liked the feeling they had when they finished that grind that once seemed endless, or finally found an instance group after requesting one for three hours.
So, the World of Warcraft without instance maps was more annoying for a newbie than the World of Warcraft with instance maps, but looking back at the learning experience, I realise that the endurance it requires to crawl through phases like that is an important part of "bonding" with the game. I'm not happy that WoW has been tuned for people that prefer to have things handed over to them, but instead of complaining about them having it easier than I had, I rather reflect on my own experiences in the past and rejoice that I had to learn things the hard way... for I am the lucky one there.
Check out Spellbound to learn more about the challenge!
Day 4 – Your best WoW memory
After giving it a thorough thought I came to the conclusion that it's not a concrete event or anything like that that I want to talk about here. It's an emotional experience that occurred over time. It's the feeling of having experienced something, conquered something, learnt something. For example, we lacked maps to most instances until Cataclysm. Back when we didn't have the maps, I had to learn to navigate through those places with my visual memory. It was a challenge, being quite new to the game otherwise, too, but once I finally figured out the places and found something - or someone -, it was a very rewarding experience.
I'm not saying that I miss the time before instance maps, or that they should be removed from the game. No. They make a very good addition and should have existed longer than they have. It's very similar to people who claim that vanilla was the best era of WoW. They don't really think so, but mix up game features with their own feelings. They don't miss the server crashes, class imbalance or incompetent specs. They just really liked the feeling they had when they finished that grind that once seemed endless, or finally found an instance group after requesting one for three hours.
So, the World of Warcraft without instance maps was more annoying for a newbie than the World of Warcraft with instance maps, but looking back at the learning experience, I realise that the endurance it requires to crawl through phases like that is an important part of "bonding" with the game. I'm not happy that WoW has been tuned for people that prefer to have things handed over to them, but instead of complaining about them having it easier than I had, I rather reflect on my own experiences in the past and rejoice that I had to learn things the hard way... for I am the lucky one there.
Saturday, 17 November 2012
20 Days of WoW blogging #3
Writing depression continues... So a challengin' we go.
Check out Spellbound to learn more about the challenge!
Day 3 – Your first day playing WoW
I can't tell what exactly was my first day playing WoW, but I do recall some of the first experiences I had on the game. My first character ever was a night elf warrior called Riyadh, named randomly after the capital, on Moonglade - the same server that still houses my main, the majority of my characters and my guild. I spawned on Teldrassil, naturally, and a friend (today also co-guild leader of mine) came to me there. She's to blame for my presence in the game. She got me to play it. It's all her fault. We began our trek along the path, where I almost instantly became the victim of a tragic event. Some aggressive mob came and one-shot me. Even the patrolling guards had no chance to help me out. I was very fascinated by the night elf jumps. I think the chance of doing a somersault in the air was lower back then than it is now, or is that just me?
Some time later we adventured into Dun Morogh and settled on a cliff of some sort. My friend was also relatively new to the game. She asked me to jump off the cliff so she could resurrect me, and I did just that. I remember that I didn't die from my first jump due to landing somewhere on the way, but I jumped down again and did manage to die. She came to resurrect me. I also attacked a wolf, which was apparently too high level for me. For a loomless little noob elf a wolf just a couple of levels higher can be most deadly, particularly back in the day.
When I was level 5 (I felt so high level!), my druidic friend took me to Booty Bay and to Ratchet from there. I loved the place! It looked so cool and Arabic. I stayed there after she went offline I had a look at my surroundings. Brewmaster Drohn was a scary high level NPC with a red nameplate! I was foolish enough to attack the level 14 (or something like that that they were back then) giraffes and lions just outside Ratchet, and obviously got killed by them - more than once.
Another very early memory is from my pre-level 10 adventures to Duskwood. I think it must've been near Raven Hill Cemetary that I kept getting ganked by much higher level undead mobs and couldn't get very far from the graveyard. Finally I managed to run away from them. I was doubtful about my will to hit level 10, because I liked the ability to resurrect at spirit healers without penalty, heh. Now that I think of it, it doesn't even make any sense to like that better, but I guess I was very scared of getting lost; being the cursed ghost who couldn't find their corpse.
Sometimes when I run across the path from Northshire Valley to Goldshire, I get a very dejavu-ish feeling, from back when I created my first rogue. In her early 20s, I went through at least two levels solely by killing crabs in Darkshore.
Check out Spellbound to learn more about the challenge!
Day 3 – Your first day playing WoW
I can't tell what exactly was my first day playing WoW, but I do recall some of the first experiences I had on the game. My first character ever was a night elf warrior called Riyadh, named randomly after the capital, on Moonglade - the same server that still houses my main, the majority of my characters and my guild. I spawned on Teldrassil, naturally, and a friend (today also co-guild leader of mine) came to me there. She's to blame for my presence in the game. She got me to play it. It's all her fault. We began our trek along the path, where I almost instantly became the victim of a tragic event. Some aggressive mob came and one-shot me. Even the patrolling guards had no chance to help me out. I was very fascinated by the night elf jumps. I think the chance of doing a somersault in the air was lower back then than it is now, or is that just me?
Some time later we adventured into Dun Morogh and settled on a cliff of some sort. My friend was also relatively new to the game. She asked me to jump off the cliff so she could resurrect me, and I did just that. I remember that I didn't die from my first jump due to landing somewhere on the way, but I jumped down again and did manage to die. She came to resurrect me. I also attacked a wolf, which was apparently too high level for me. For a loomless little noob elf a wolf just a couple of levels higher can be most deadly, particularly back in the day.
When I was level 5 (I felt so high level!), my druidic friend took me to Booty Bay and to Ratchet from there. I loved the place! It looked so cool and Arabic. I stayed there after she went offline I had a look at my surroundings. Brewmaster Drohn was a scary high level NPC with a red nameplate! I was foolish enough to attack the level 14 (or something like that that they were back then) giraffes and lions just outside Ratchet, and obviously got killed by them - more than once.
Another very early memory is from my pre-level 10 adventures to Duskwood. I think it must've been near Raven Hill Cemetary that I kept getting ganked by much higher level undead mobs and couldn't get very far from the graveyard. Finally I managed to run away from them. I was doubtful about my will to hit level 10, because I liked the ability to resurrect at spirit healers without penalty, heh. Now that I think of it, it doesn't even make any sense to like that better, but I guess I was very scared of getting lost; being the cursed ghost who couldn't find their corpse.
Sometimes when I run across the path from Northshire Valley to Goldshire, I get a very dejavu-ish feeling, from back when I created my first rogue. In her early 20s, I went through at least two levels solely by killing crabs in Darkshore.
Wednesday, 31 October 2012
Through Your Interface: 15 Days of Screenshots #13
See Saz's blog for more information regarding the challenge!
13. A fond memory
Shed a little tear, grin a little grin, and show us an image that invokes a fond memory for you.
I'm skipping a day, but worry not, I'll post that one later. I just happen to have this one ready. I couldn't decide between these two very different kind of moments, so "screw it", I thought. I think they speak for themselves.
13. A fond memory
Shed a little tear, grin a little grin, and show us an image that invokes a fond memory for you.
I'm skipping a day, but worry not, I'll post that one later. I just happen to have this one ready. I couldn't decide between these two very different kind of moments, so "screw it", I thought. I think they speak for themselves.
Friday, 26 October 2012
R.I.P. Matra
In loving memory of Matra, the author of Yömyssyt, my friend, who had no love for WoW, but who was always there for me, regardless of what time of the day it was. She even promised to read my blog despite her dislike for the game itself. We were brought together by Scorpions, so that's why the song. Much love, dear friend. You're engraved deep in my heart.
Remember to tell people that you care about them.
Wednesday, 17 October 2012
Through Your Interface: 15 Days of Screenshots #10
Back to this challenge! I'm not yet very close to the end, but I've carefully kept my eye out for another challenge to accept once I'm done with this one. Are you hosting a challenge? Feel free to throw me suggestions!
See Saz's blog for more information regarding the challenge!
10. Your WoW crew
Who are the people you hang out with day in and day out? Do you only hang out with your raid mates? Do you have a small, tight knit group of friends that you hang out with? Or are you a strange longer who just hangs out with your pets?
I digged up some really old screenshots for this one! Enjoy!
I most likely wouldn't play WoW at all if it wasn't for that crazy drood. My bestest durid! We do loads of weird and crazy stuff together, and have fallen into a ton of holes (as you see above). Hearthstone is a good friend. Kidney is awesome!
Ehehehehahaahaahahheeihhhohihoh! I have much better pictures of Lanfranco, but I want to show him that I have a shot like this. Haha. The paladin in the background is a lovely one. Just look at his gear, it consists of like 333-346 blues. Man, that was long ago. It was also a very important time for me, because I stayed in a crappy guild for two reasons: to be in the same one with Kidney, as it is natural, and to be around Lan. I'm not sure if I've admitted that to him, but it was like that for a long time - it didn't end until we both got kicked... But that's a different story, heh. There's so much to say about him, so I'll summarise it like this: <3
You can also see Billx, a golden-hearted dwarven hunter in the shot. We recruited him to the guild when killing Omen that day. And nowadays he's with us in Menagerie.
You see a night elf death knight, too? That's weird, 'cause I don't.
The bear you see above is someone I know as Mae, our main tank for most of Dragon Soul and currently a very versatile personality. Despite everything I'm happy he's stuck with us. Sometimes it surprises me that he has. My journey with him is one of those weird chains that happened for an unknown reason, but I'm sure they were meant to happen.
I don't have individual screenshots of everyone I spend time with on WoW, so I'll just give a shout out to our whole raid group for being lovely and tolerating me. I love raiding with you, wiping with you and sharing the guild with you. You're the ones that made it our guild. And you guys are epic!
See Saz's blog for more information regarding the challenge!
10. Your WoW crew
Who are the people you hang out with day in and day out? Do you only hang out with your raid mates? Do you have a small, tight knit group of friends that you hang out with? Or are you a strange longer who just hangs out with your pets?
I digged up some really old screenshots for this one! Enjoy!
 |
| A pre-Cataclysm hole! |
I most likely wouldn't play WoW at all if it wasn't for that crazy drood. My bestest durid! We do loads of weird and crazy stuff together, and have fallen into a ton of holes (as you see above). Hearthstone is a good friend. Kidney is awesome!
Ehehehehahaahaahahheeihhhohihoh! I have much better pictures of Lanfranco, but I want to show him that I have a shot like this. Haha. The paladin in the background is a lovely one. Just look at his gear, it consists of like 333-346 blues. Man, that was long ago. It was also a very important time for me, because I stayed in a crappy guild for two reasons: to be in the same one with Kidney, as it is natural, and to be around Lan. I'm not sure if I've admitted that to him, but it was like that for a long time - it didn't end until we both got kicked... But that's a different story, heh. There's so much to say about him, so I'll summarise it like this: <3
You can also see Billx, a golden-hearted dwarven hunter in the shot. We recruited him to the guild when killing Omen that day. And nowadays he's with us in Menagerie.
You see a night elf death knight, too? That's weird, 'cause I don't.
 |
| Remember this, Mae? |
The bear you see above is someone I know as Mae, our main tank for most of Dragon Soul and currently a very versatile personality. Despite everything I'm happy he's stuck with us. Sometimes it surprises me that he has. My journey with him is one of those weird chains that happened for an unknown reason, but I'm sure they were meant to happen.
I don't have individual screenshots of everyone I spend time with on WoW, so I'll just give a shout out to our whole raid group for being lovely and tolerating me. I love raiding with you, wiping with you and sharing the guild with you. You're the ones that made it our guild. And you guys are epic!
<3
Monday, 17 September 2012
How nothing else matters
I'm ditching work again just to write about something that's on my heart right at this moment.
Some time ago I mentioned how I feel about Northrend generally. I'd like to share a particular memory, probably my dearest pure WoW memory in history. It's one that I really treasure and cherish.
Today I've spent a lot of time mining with Vlad and just recently I went back to Northrend, Borean Tundra and Howling Fjord in particular, to ease his shortage of cobalt. I was, as usual, reminded of when I did the Explore Northrend achievement that awards Tabard of the Explorer with Nicasia. I only had the slowest flying skill, so I made slow progress, but dear Naaru how I enjoyed that. Similarly to how some people say that vanilla was the best time of WoW - they don't miss the server crashes, endless grinds, unpractical mechanics, severely unbalanced class performance or buffing a 40 man raid every 5 minutes. They miss the feeling they had when they were doing it, and the truth is they're never getting it back, just like I'm never getting back my Wrath of the Lich King. For me it was the golden age of WoW, and this song is my memento of it:
It's not exactly the version that I listened to, but similar enough.
Back then I couldn't play with the graphics I do these days; in fact I couldn't even dream of it. I played with custom graphics that were lower than low, to make fight situations as tolerable as possible. I knew much less of the game than I do these days, both lore- and mechanics-wise. Dalaran lagged like hell, but that music still gives me positive vibes, no matter what.
The elemental unrest world event awakens similar feelings in me, although it was already on the edge of the modern era of my WoW life; not quite like that hazy part, such as your childhood that you're not quite sure about, it just makes you feel a certain way for what it is. I don't know if I'd go back to those times if I could. Probably. Maybe. I don't know. After all it's good that time traveling isn't (yet) possible. It would make things like 'moving on' very, very hard. The cost of living in the past is the present.
Why I wanted to write about this now is not just because I got reminded of it once again, but because it's one of those things that make the future seem light and hopeful. It represents how nothing else matters except the way you feel about it and what you can get out of it. Even though it's been long since my Northrend exploration, I'm still able to feel the exact same feelings I did back then. I sincerely hope that people take things as they come. Forget about the preconceptions and drop the prejudice attitude. Because you never know, it might just turn out to be something great, you only need to let it be that.
Some time ago I mentioned how I feel about Northrend generally. I'd like to share a particular memory, probably my dearest pure WoW memory in history. It's one that I really treasure and cherish.
Today I've spent a lot of time mining with Vlad and just recently I went back to Northrend, Borean Tundra and Howling Fjord in particular, to ease his shortage of cobalt. I was, as usual, reminded of when I did the Explore Northrend achievement that awards Tabard of the Explorer with Nicasia. I only had the slowest flying skill, so I made slow progress, but dear Naaru how I enjoyed that. Similarly to how some people say that vanilla was the best time of WoW - they don't miss the server crashes, endless grinds, unpractical mechanics, severely unbalanced class performance or buffing a 40 man raid every 5 minutes. They miss the feeling they had when they were doing it, and the truth is they're never getting it back, just like I'm never getting back my Wrath of the Lich King. For me it was the golden age of WoW, and this song is my memento of it:
It's not exactly the version that I listened to, but similar enough.
Back then I couldn't play with the graphics I do these days; in fact I couldn't even dream of it. I played with custom graphics that were lower than low, to make fight situations as tolerable as possible. I knew much less of the game than I do these days, both lore- and mechanics-wise. Dalaran lagged like hell, but that music still gives me positive vibes, no matter what.
The elemental unrest world event awakens similar feelings in me, although it was already on the edge of the modern era of my WoW life; not quite like that hazy part, such as your childhood that you're not quite sure about, it just makes you feel a certain way for what it is. I don't know if I'd go back to those times if I could. Probably. Maybe. I don't know. After all it's good that time traveling isn't (yet) possible. It would make things like 'moving on' very, very hard. The cost of living in the past is the present.
Why I wanted to write about this now is not just because I got reminded of it once again, but because it's one of those things that make the future seem light and hopeful. It represents how nothing else matters except the way you feel about it and what you can get out of it. Even though it's been long since my Northrend exploration, I'm still able to feel the exact same feelings I did back then. I sincerely hope that people take things as they come. Forget about the preconceptions and drop the prejudice attitude. Because you never know, it might just turn out to be something great, you only need to let it be that.
Wednesday, 22 August 2012
From the archives
I thought I'd share some old screenshots. I've been going through them in order to find certain ones for the 15 Days of Screenshots challenge, but I haven't yet managed to find those. Instead I've found everything else - I didn't even remember some of these shots existed. Here are some that I liked coming across.
This one is from Wrath of the Lich King time. My friend and I visited Thunder Bluff just to mess around and have a good time. We attracted two orcs of whom the other one has forever shaped my idea of orc warriors. After a long RP style walk/backpeddling retreat, they finally attacked us. I've censored my horrible UI for greater good.
The last moments of Wrath of the Lich King here. I wanted to make sure I was the last person to kill the low level Gamon on Defias Brotherhood EU, and I was. Again horrible UI is censored.
I never played back when all battlegrounds were server-specific, although I really wish I had. It would give a whole new meaning and feeling to PvP. Wintergrasp and Tol Barad aren't really comparable with that.
This shot was taken in Cataclysm, probably approaching mid-expansion already. One time in Alterac Valley someone summoned Lokholar the Ice Lord. That was definitely the most epic AV battle I've ever experienced. Factions were pushing each other to opposite directions, the Horde nearly reaching Vanndar a couple of times (with the elemental), then the elemental got killed and we pushed them back again. It was amazing, and the only time I've ever met the ice lord.
Now this is from Tol Barad Peninsula with Lanfranco, the paladin in the background pic. I really like the feeling in the shot. Too bad it was taken on my old crappy PC, so it has bad graphics. Lan's nameplate is a bit disturbing, too. I'd like to redo the shot sometimes, now with good graphics and without nameplates.
This is all for now, I'll post more if I encounter some that don't require too much censorship!
This one is from Wrath of the Lich King time. My friend and I visited Thunder Bluff just to mess around and have a good time. We attracted two orcs of whom the other one has forever shaped my idea of orc warriors. After a long RP style walk/backpeddling retreat, they finally attacked us. I've censored my horrible UI for greater good.
The last moments of Wrath of the Lich King here. I wanted to make sure I was the last person to kill the low level Gamon on Defias Brotherhood EU, and I was. Again horrible UI is censored.
I never played back when all battlegrounds were server-specific, although I really wish I had. It would give a whole new meaning and feeling to PvP. Wintergrasp and Tol Barad aren't really comparable with that.
This shot was taken in Cataclysm, probably approaching mid-expansion already. One time in Alterac Valley someone summoned Lokholar the Ice Lord. That was definitely the most epic AV battle I've ever experienced. Factions were pushing each other to opposite directions, the Horde nearly reaching Vanndar a couple of times (with the elemental), then the elemental got killed and we pushed them back again. It was amazing, and the only time I've ever met the ice lord.
Now this is from Tol Barad Peninsula with Lanfranco, the paladin in the background pic. I really like the feeling in the shot. Too bad it was taken on my old crappy PC, so it has bad graphics. Lan's nameplate is a bit disturbing, too. I'd like to redo the shot sometimes, now with good graphics and without nameplates.
This is all for now, I'll post more if I encounter some that don't require too much censorship!
Monday, 13 August 2012
Through Your Interface: 15 Days of Screenshots #1
I have decided to participate in the 15 Days of Screenshots challenge featured on World of Saz. I've thought of doing so for quite a while already, but now that I'm spending my days doing more than just playing WoW, I don't come up with as much things to write about (boo real life!), so it's a pretty good time to do something like this. Since I'm pretty sure endless cries regarding guild worries would be pretty depressing to read.
I had a drastic change in my gaming equipment about eight months ago, but I'm glad I took the time to save all the old screenshots before emptying the older PC. I'm sure the difference in graphics in some shots will be notable, heh.
1. Favorite hangout
Find yourself perching in a particular tree as a druid? Have a certain hovel you like to hang out in on your undead rogue? Show us where it is, and why your character hangs out there.
Out of a several options I chose this spot - a ledge with a couple of trees, located behind Stormwind Keep. I could have chosen something more interesting, but the amount of emotion that has come out of me in that spot is great, therefore I ended up with this one. It's one of the most important spots of Cataclysm to me personally.
Don't worry, the other shots will be a bit more interesting visually!
I had a drastic change in my gaming equipment about eight months ago, but I'm glad I took the time to save all the old screenshots before emptying the older PC. I'm sure the difference in graphics in some shots will be notable, heh.
1. Favorite hangout
Find yourself perching in a particular tree as a druid? Have a certain hovel you like to hang out in on your undead rogue? Show us where it is, and why your character hangs out there.
 |
| Taken on an alt - I HAVE in fact explored Elwynn Forest! :D |
Out of a several options I chose this spot - a ledge with a couple of trees, located behind Stormwind Keep. I could have chosen something more interesting, but the amount of emotion that has come out of me in that spot is great, therefore I ended up with this one. It's one of the most important spots of Cataclysm to me personally.
Don't worry, the other shots will be a bit more interesting visually!
Thursday, 19 July 2012
Farewell embodiment of my noobism
Today I made a decision I know I will always regret in a way, but I also know I had to do it. Such a difficult thing: if I hadn't done it, I'd be bitter about the consequences. And if I did it, like I did, I'm disappointed in myself in a way. It's hard to tell whether I'm happy about my decision or not, but there are certainly both good and bad sides to it. It's working towards the future.
What I did was I deleted my second character ever, the level 60 human rogue I have mentioned in a couple of posts earlier. She was my first main and I share the most noobish memories with her. I know that I'll always carry memories with me (except in the case of amnesia, but it seems quite unlikely to me now) - but I can't do the same to the pre-Cata items, some of them rogue-only that she had. Below are examples of those that were (mostly) unique to her inventory, those I don't even have on my main Nicasia, although she was created shortly after Miss S.
This now makes me wonder why I had to delete the first totem Nica had, you know, that "counts as an earth, fire, water and air totem" relic without stats shamans got after finishing their totem quest chains. I even remember the moment I deleted it, and where I stood when I did that: in the trade district bank (remember old bank with the queue ropes?) after I had got Totem of the Thunderhead.
Finally, the reason behind S's deletion was simply that I'm running out of character slots instead of ideas for new, inspiring alts. For years I've known that I'll never be inspired to play my first rogue again. I also know I'll have lots of fun with different kind of alts now and in the future. I rarely manage to create an alt I end up playing all the way to the maximum level, but it does happen. And I'm glad to be prepared for being stuck by a great idea for a new character.
Thank you Blizzard for the 11th character slot coming up in Mists of Pandaria! Thank you! /curtsey
What I did was I deleted my second character ever, the level 60 human rogue I have mentioned in a couple of posts earlier. She was my first main and I share the most noobish memories with her. I know that I'll always carry memories with me (except in the case of amnesia, but it seems quite unlikely to me now) - but I can't do the same to the pre-Cata items, some of them rogue-only that she had. Below are examples of those that were (mostly) unique to her inventory, those I don't even have on my main Nicasia, although she was created shortly after Miss S.
 |
| I remember Darkshore being all out of cats when I first went there to collect these. |
 |
| I didn't remember I had this one on Nica, thanks bag addon! |
 |
| Just an item no longer available in the game. |
This now makes me wonder why I had to delete the first totem Nica had, you know, that "counts as an earth, fire, water and air totem" relic without stats shamans got after finishing their totem quest chains. I even remember the moment I deleted it, and where I stood when I did that: in the trade district bank (remember old bank with the queue ropes?) after I had got Totem of the Thunderhead.
Finally, the reason behind S's deletion was simply that I'm running out of character slots instead of ideas for new, inspiring alts. For years I've known that I'll never be inspired to play my first rogue again. I also know I'll have lots of fun with different kind of alts now and in the future. I rarely manage to create an alt I end up playing all the way to the maximum level, but it does happen. And I'm glad to be prepared for being stuck by a great idea for a new character.
Thank you Blizzard for the 11th character slot coming up in Mists of Pandaria! Thank you! /curtsey
Wednesday, 20 June 2012
From Northrend with love
Rage of the winter mold the horizon,
cover the mountains, forests and lakes.
Rage of the winter, magical wonder,
enchanted fury, majestic force.
(Rhapsody - Rage of the Winter)
There is one I can call my favorite zone in all of Azeroth if I am asked that, but I'd rather mention the whole continent, for it is full of things that really make me feel at home. In addition to that it's extremely beautiful. Therefore, this post is fully dedicated to Northrend, my memories and my feelings towards it. I know it'll most likely sound a bit messed up, but hey, that's how things are inside my mind. Warning: Might be boring.
 |
| One of my first memories of Northrend was this spot in Dragonblight. |
When I'm in a dungeon that's located in Northrend, I like to open a window and if the season allows, I can feel like it would actually feel in-game. I love the breeze and chills in the Halls of Reflection. In Utgarde Keep the fire glows with heat. In the Halls of Lightning I step on cold steel barefoot.
If I had to go on a holiday anywhere in Azeroth, I'd go to Grizzly Hills. I'm pretty sure that I couldn't find anything more homey in Azeroth
than a logging camp in Grizzly Hills. There's just something about those
that makes me want to become a lumberjack. Altogether it's probably the most beautiful area in the whole game. Strangely enough it's also the zone that looks like my homeland the most. Again; it was WoW that really made me see the beauty of this country. I think to most people 'holiday' means going somewhere warm, but I'm not a big fan of warmth, sweat and endless sun, so I'd be most happy in a place such as Amberpine Lodge.
I didn't really choose my favorite zone. It chose me. Not only is it my lucky zone and the location of my favorite raid, but also home to my favorite quests. I'm talking about the Storm Peaks.Back when I was digging for my vrykul drinking horn, I had just finished a digsite in Valkyrion and was making my way to Frosthold to take a flight to another site. When I was very close to the frost dwarf village, my NPCscan went off, saying "Time-Lost Proto..." I thought it was a bloody joke. I flew around a bit, trying to target it and found it pretty fast. I aggroed it and killed it on a cliff. Within a minute, there were three people slapping me across the face and crying on the drake's shoulder. I spent a whole of about five minutes in the zone that time. Like a very dear friend of mine said: "All you wanted was a drinking horn, but you got the time-lost proto-drake."
Secondly, the polar bear mount dropped from the satchel the first time I did the daily.
My favorite quests are those where you gank and spank vrykul men in a mine. That always makes me feel good. No further explanations or reasons provided. When it comes to northern lights, there's no better place in Azeroth than the Storm Peaks if you wish to watch those. I just love how the silence expresses how cold and frozen the place is - also something I have experienced in real life.
To tell you the truth, I'm very cautious when it comes to good
memories. I don't take them lightly at all. I treasure them to the point
where it sometimes makes things a bit complicated. It's just because I
know what the worst case scenario could be like.I don't want to associate my good memories of places, such as Northrend, with people that mean something to me. Not in any way. Because if those relationships get wrecked one day, my good memories of those places will be ruined. They will forever remind me of that person; how I felt when things went wrong. It's already happened a little bit, and the possibility of it happening again scares me. I know I am overly sensitive about this, and I hope people don't misunderstand this matter. I also hope they'll respect it. It is not to express something negative towards those people, but to protect myself. I think it also has to do with independence; not everything should have something to do with someone. I don't claim to own Northrend, but I'd like to be the master of my memories.
Some time before I got the Time-Lost Proto-Drake, I had two dreams of it. In the other one, I was looking for it in Sholazar Basin, flying over the trees. Of course that's not where it spawns in - I was going to say 'real life' - game, but I remember that dream like it was last night that I had it.
And so we come to the end of the post about my feelings and memories of this icy continent. It was during Wrath of the Lich King that I was introduced to WoW, all thanks to a good friend. A lot has followed, and it's been a chain of incredible events. Somehow it all lead to what things are now; I'm a guild master and I can see how effort pays off. When our guild hit level twenty-five, I felt that I could finally breathe a little, after all that hard work. My guild was now a real guild.I want to make a difference in how people are treated, how they are appreciated. I learn leadership as I do it, I notice myself change as a person, and I'm not quite sure how I ended up in this place... I like to think it was meant to happen. But the fact that I can make a difference, I can shape new values, I can do things in a different way, is amazing.
The world is closing in, and did you ever think
that we could be so close, like brothers?
(Scorpions - Wind of Change)
Sunday, 10 June 2012
So...
Something happened. I got disgusted by my own writing. It frustrates me beyond understanding that something, in this case language skill, is preventing me from being as good as I could be. Writing is the only thing in the world I am really good at, and this situation pains me a lot.
I can't and don't want to just stop updating my blog, but I'm going to take a break from those (excuses of) stories and just write something else for a while. I'll probably try again one day, but not now. I don't want to hate the one thing I am talented at because of other people. So please, enjoy my break and keep reading my blog, but if you would be so kind, please don't read the earlier posts.
This one is about PvP.
I would never call myself a PvP pro of any sort, so I'll just settle for explaining something of my own that, like always, makes little sense.
My main character Nicasia is elemental/elemental specced, meaning that her main spec is elemental for PvE, and off spec elemental for PvP. Her talent trees, as of patch 4.3.4, the last one of Cataclysm, look like this:
And she is glyphed like this:
I feel the need to say something about these. Stoneclaw glyph is there only because we thought of the possibility of me soaking an Hour of Twilight at Ultraxion. Then I never came to change it, because I didn't think I needed to. Ghost wolf is there for a better chance of avoiding a Shockwave when further away, faster movement at Zon'ozz and all that stuff. I like Glyph of Elemental Mastery for PvP, because I seem to suck at avoiding the situation where I get hit. I also suck at having EM available at those times. I should probably swap it for Stoneclaw, as the absorption effect still persists if you change your earth totem after popping it, however I probably won't PvP much before Pandaria.
My problem with PvP is that I lose my nerves. I get annoyed, I rage at myself, I ruin what's left of my peace of mind and wreck my day. It has a lot to do with my fear of failing. In fact player verses players, doing it and talking about it, is one of my weak spots on World of Warcraft. I haven't PvP'd with Nica, or any other character except my lowbie Forsaken rogue Ancelot, since a very traumatising arena match some months ago. There doesn't seem to be a limit to how much I can terrify myself with my own behavior. Despite all that I have some amazing player verses player memories. Not to mention that I am a great!! amateur psychologist, and therefore try to cure myself with music therapy.
Warriors by Freedom Call works great in Warsong Gulch, which is slightly too much a claustrophobic battleground for my taste. I have some awesome memories of that, and I imagine it would also work in various other situations.
If I'm generally not in any particular kind of mood, I like to play Supreme by Robbie Williams. There's absolutely nothing about Robbie that would make one associate him with PvP action, but if you take a closer look at the song's lyrics, it's actually understandable why it fits a moment of aggression and uncontrollable rage.
... And all the best women are married
All the handsome men are gay
You feel deprived
Yeah, are you questioning your size?
Is there a tumour in your humour,
are there bags under your eyes?
Do you leave dents where you sit,
are you getting on a bit?
Will you survive?
You must survive
... Do you need a bit of rough?
Get on your knees
For a couple of battlegrounds I tried Eros Ramazzotti, but found that the memories related to his album Stilelibero are too far from anything gaming-related.
Now something for the imaginary readers: what's your PvP soundtrack like?
I can't and don't want to just stop updating my blog, but I'm going to take a break from those (excuses of) stories and just write something else for a while. I'll probably try again one day, but not now. I don't want to hate the one thing I am talented at because of other people. So please, enjoy my break and keep reading my blog, but if you would be so kind, please don't read the earlier posts.
This one is about PvP.
I would never call myself a PvP pro of any sort, so I'll just settle for explaining something of my own that, like always, makes little sense.
My main character Nicasia is elemental/elemental specced, meaning that her main spec is elemental for PvE, and off spec elemental for PvP. Her talent trees, as of patch 4.3.4, the last one of Cataclysm, look like this:
And she is glyphed like this:
I feel the need to say something about these. Stoneclaw glyph is there only because we thought of the possibility of me soaking an Hour of Twilight at Ultraxion. Then I never came to change it, because I didn't think I needed to. Ghost wolf is there for a better chance of avoiding a Shockwave when further away, faster movement at Zon'ozz and all that stuff. I like Glyph of Elemental Mastery for PvP, because I seem to suck at avoiding the situation where I get hit. I also suck at having EM available at those times. I should probably swap it for Stoneclaw, as the absorption effect still persists if you change your earth totem after popping it, however I probably won't PvP much before Pandaria.
My problem with PvP is that I lose my nerves. I get annoyed, I rage at myself, I ruin what's left of my peace of mind and wreck my day. It has a lot to do with my fear of failing. In fact player verses players, doing it and talking about it, is one of my weak spots on World of Warcraft. I haven't PvP'd with Nica, or any other character except my lowbie Forsaken rogue Ancelot, since a very traumatising arena match some months ago. There doesn't seem to be a limit to how much I can terrify myself with my own behavior. Despite all that I have some amazing player verses player memories. Not to mention that I am a great!! amateur psychologist, and therefore try to cure myself with music therapy.
Warriors by Freedom Call works great in Warsong Gulch, which is slightly too much a claustrophobic battleground for my taste. I have some awesome memories of that, and I imagine it would also work in various other situations.
If I'm generally not in any particular kind of mood, I like to play Supreme by Robbie Williams. There's absolutely nothing about Robbie that would make one associate him with PvP action, but if you take a closer look at the song's lyrics, it's actually understandable why it fits a moment of aggression and uncontrollable rage.
... And all the best women are married
All the handsome men are gay
You feel deprived
Yeah, are you questioning your size?
Is there a tumour in your humour,
are there bags under your eyes?
Do you leave dents where you sit,
are you getting on a bit?
Will you survive?
You must survive
... Do you need a bit of rough?
Get on your knees
For a couple of battlegrounds I tried Eros Ramazzotti, but found that the memories related to his album Stilelibero are too far from anything gaming-related.
Now something for the imaginary readers: what's your PvP soundtrack like?
Thursday, 17 May 2012
You might not remember me, but... Part I (warning: might be boring)
Something a bit alternative inc.
This post I dedicate entirely to people who have been a part of my WoW experience in one way or another. Some of them more essentially, some just made a brief appearance - the main thing is that I still remember them today. So, to honor the memory they left me, I took a moment to think about the person. My plan was to also visit some places that reminded me of them, but since I am not able to log on WoW (long story short, tried to log in in another country and account got locked, need to wait for serial number) I am not able to do that now. I'll visit those places in my mind though.
I'm pretty sure I could stuff many people into this post, so to prevent it from getting too confusing, I'll write multiple parts.
1. First off we have someone who I know nothing about. I remember him from the days I spent on my first rogue. I was a complete noob and he was nice to me despite that. I think we had a short RP moment in Goldshire..? I'm not even sure about this, but I think he was a male night elf death knight. I suppose I should search for him on Armory. Regardless, I have a memory of him and I can still find the character on my friend list.
2. The next person is someone I first met in Gnomeregan while levelling Nicasia. The human paladin actually took the time and effort to use capital letters in his text; something that always impresses me (although it can seem a bit arrogant, too, with a dot in the end, but hey, that's a different story now.) We did a few dungeons together and afterwards stayed in Razorfen Kraul to talk. There, before Charlga Razorflank's throne, we sat at a campfire and talked until we agreed about real ID friendship.
Although there have been more and less difficult times, we've remained friends to this day and I am glad about it.
3. The first time I encountered this person was when he overheard a couple of friends and me critisising the United States. It's a bit difficult for me to write about him, because by the time I heard the truth about some things, it was already too late to do anything about it. Also, I don't want these people to be too regocnisable, so I can't mention some essential things about him. The main thing is, though, that I have some good memories of him, for example hunting rarespawns in Northrend and some long conversations.
Sadly we are no longer in touch and I don't know how he is doing.
4. One night in early Cataclysm I was standing around in Stormwind. I got a whisper to make a raid group with someone who wanted to do Molten Core. I always say yes to these things if possible, so I did that time as well. He asked if I wanted to talk about something while he does Molten Core, which sounded alright to me. And when we talked, we did mention fruit and porn in the same sentence. Hmm.
We ended up doing AQ40 together right after and talked more. By the time we had finished doing that, I knew I wanted to befriend that guy. Lots and lots has happened since then, but we're still friends.
5. Again in early Cataclysm. I was quite well geared for someone who hadn't raided current content yet, so I could easily get picked as a pug person for guild runs. This happened for the Conclaive of Wind. The raid itself wasn't particularly successful, no bosses were downed that night, but there was a person there who I still remember to this day.
He was a paladin tank, whose character's name described his hair colour. Well, the character's at least. Some time after the raid, he /waved at me in Stormwind. That made me happy. I didn't think he'd remember me, but he did.
More social nostalgia will be featured in part II.
This post I dedicate entirely to people who have been a part of my WoW experience in one way or another. Some of them more essentially, some just made a brief appearance - the main thing is that I still remember them today. So, to honor the memory they left me, I took a moment to think about the person. My plan was to also visit some places that reminded me of them, but since I am not able to log on WoW (long story short, tried to log in in another country and account got locked, need to wait for serial number) I am not able to do that now. I'll visit those places in my mind though.
I'm pretty sure I could stuff many people into this post, so to prevent it from getting too confusing, I'll write multiple parts.
1. First off we have someone who I know nothing about. I remember him from the days I spent on my first rogue. I was a complete noob and he was nice to me despite that. I think we had a short RP moment in Goldshire..? I'm not even sure about this, but I think he was a male night elf death knight. I suppose I should search for him on Armory. Regardless, I have a memory of him and I can still find the character on my friend list.
2. The next person is someone I first met in Gnomeregan while levelling Nicasia. The human paladin actually took the time and effort to use capital letters in his text; something that always impresses me (although it can seem a bit arrogant, too, with a dot in the end, but hey, that's a different story now.) We did a few dungeons together and afterwards stayed in Razorfen Kraul to talk. There, before Charlga Razorflank's throne, we sat at a campfire and talked until we agreed about real ID friendship.
Although there have been more and less difficult times, we've remained friends to this day and I am glad about it.
3. The first time I encountered this person was when he overheard a couple of friends and me critisising the United States. It's a bit difficult for me to write about him, because by the time I heard the truth about some things, it was already too late to do anything about it. Also, I don't want these people to be too regocnisable, so I can't mention some essential things about him. The main thing is, though, that I have some good memories of him, for example hunting rarespawns in Northrend and some long conversations.
Sadly we are no longer in touch and I don't know how he is doing.
4. One night in early Cataclysm I was standing around in Stormwind. I got a whisper to make a raid group with someone who wanted to do Molten Core. I always say yes to these things if possible, so I did that time as well. He asked if I wanted to talk about something while he does Molten Core, which sounded alright to me. And when we talked, we did mention fruit and porn in the same sentence. Hmm.
We ended up doing AQ40 together right after and talked more. By the time we had finished doing that, I knew I wanted to befriend that guy. Lots and lots has happened since then, but we're still friends.
5. Again in early Cataclysm. I was quite well geared for someone who hadn't raided current content yet, so I could easily get picked as a pug person for guild runs. This happened for the Conclaive of Wind. The raid itself wasn't particularly successful, no bosses were downed that night, but there was a person there who I still remember to this day.
He was a paladin tank, whose character's name described his hair colour. Well, the character's at least. Some time after the raid, he /waved at me in Stormwind. That made me happy. I didn't think he'd remember me, but he did.
More social nostalgia will be featured in part II.
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